


Lost You

by ConfusedQueer



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Dialogue Heavy, F/F, I'm Sorry, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-01-03
Packaged: 2018-05-11 09:34:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5622460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ConfusedQueer/pseuds/ConfusedQueer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is no summary. Only pain</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lost You

**Author's Note:**

> I finished writing this at 2 am. I'm sorry.

“Laura... My beautiful little creampuff. I had always planned on keeping her safe. I never meant for any of this to happen. I... I still remember how much she hated me. How at first it was just the normal seduce then capture that I had been doing for hundreds of years. But Laura resisted. She fought, and that fight in her eyes drew me in. She reminded me of Elle... S-so I tried to stay away. 

 

But... I couldn’t.  
She was the thing that broke me. I foolishly let myself be seduced and tied down. A reverse cat and mouse. And somehow the great Countess Mircalla Karnstein was captured by a bunch of lack wits. Then Will came. And I found myself protecting the very thing that had tied me up and starved me for weeks. But it was Laura. Dear sweet... Laura H-hollis. And... I already loved her. I couldn’t let Maman take her. Not this time. She wasn’t Elle.   
Elle who abandoned me as soon as my true nature was revealed.  
Laura’s feelings had grown after she discovered who I was. She told me time and time again that I wasn’t a monster, that I was more than Mother had raised me to be. She reminded me what it was like to be human.  
So I helped her kill Mother. Hoping that it would solve the problems of my elongated life. That Laura and I could finally be together. Happy. But instead we raised the demigod of light and we had to return to the campus of Silas. My sister Mattie arrived soon thereafter and an entire shit storm ensued that I haven’t the time nor s-s-str-rength, damn it, to tell.   
For a short time we were happy together. There were nightmares and flashbacks, but we kept each other happy. I, unknown to her, slipped my own blood into her food to keep her from aging at the normal speed of a human. It was selfish,but I wanted to buy us sometime before we had to make the choice. I met her dad, we acted like a family, he found out my true nature, but h-he still gave me his blessing. So Laura and I got married two years after she finished college at a new university on the other side of Austria. on our wedding night I gave in to her begging and she became like I never wanted to be.   
Five years... Five wonderful years of doing whatever the hell we wanted because it wouldn’t matter 50 years down the line and we had time. We had forever...

 

Or... S-so I th-thought.

 

I thought we were safe. I really did. But somehow we were captured and starved. And then... then... Oh God if you truly exist then why?! Why would they want to hurt me? Hurt us? We never harmed innocent people! It isn’t fair damn it. Laura didn’t deserve it. I didn’t save her time and time again just so humans could tie us down and rip her limb from limb in front of me and throw her in a fire! B-but th-they did. In shock I began to have seizures. Praying to anything out there to just die. But the imbeciles gave me blood to revive me.   
Once revitalized with blood and pure unmatched fury, and fury can not even match what I felt, I killed them all. I killed them and then raised them up as one of my own just so I could have the pleasure of watching the life drain out of their eyes again and again.   
When I was done I remembered a promise to her father that if she ever died in my care, that I would bring whatever was left of her to him, whether he be alive or in the grave. And if he be alive allow him to punish me as he saw fit.  
So I searched for any trace of her in the fire or around, but her ashes and the parts of her body that had yet to be burned had vanished. Most likely from one of my victims that I skipped over. Instead of tracing him down... I went to Laura’s father.  
He answered the door, the large Hollis smiled on his face and despite myself I sobbed, falling into his a-arms. And I f-felt a-as the w-weight of the w-world seemed to c-crash down on him. and he asked. He asked the damn question. His words still ring in my bloody ears, as if permanently echoing there, laced with more pain than any human should feel.

“Oh god. S-she’s gone. My baby girl! Please Carmilla! Carm... Carm! Tell me you’re lying! My baby, Laura can’t be d-dead!”

I couldn’t deny him. I had nothing in my body. I had barely eaten but the hunger wasn’t there. I felt sick and as I saw my tears stain his white shirt, they stayed pink. Despite it being my fault he hugged me close, bringing me into his house and sitting with me on the over plush couch that Laura had spent High school studying on. I fell asleep at some point. Waking up to him looking through an old photo album with bloodshot eyes. He began talking about Laura’s mother. How she had died from cancer when Laura was eleven and how he blamed himself and never got over it because she had been the love of his life. But then how he powered through because Laura needed him. Because Laura was a piece of his wife and something that he would cherish and keep safe. And how he did keep her safe, but how his protectiveness was what got her killed because he never taught her how the real world truly was.  
He told me how he expected to be angry at me, but how as he remembered how Laura looked at me and how I looked at her and treated her and then just how broken I looked on his doorstep, he knew I loved her more than life. He walked out of the room, bringing back a shabby yellow mass. He told me that it had been Laura’s mom’s and after she died Laura took it everywhere to the point that he had to buy a replacement for her to take to college.   
H-he gave it to me... After a month of staying with him I left. Ten years later he died in his sleep at the age of 68. Much too young, but aged from grief to the point he was closer to 90.  
That was more than 30 years ago... But I can’t do it anymore. I see Laura everywhere and I just can’t do it. I haven’t eaten in so long that my vision was too blurry to write... So in remembrance of my late wife, Laura Anne Hollis-Karnstein, I am making this final video in our story. I... it shouldn’t be long now. I’ve already had a set a seizures a day or so ago and I can hardly move... I’m sorry. I love her so much and I-”  
Carmilla stops, opening and closing her mouth, face sticky and pale from crying and lack of food. Her eyes widen as she looks off in the distance. She mouths one word, Laura, before falling limp, eyes slowly closing. One last tear falls to the carpet. Clear.

*Half an hour later*  
The door to the hotel room is ripped of its hinges and thrown aside. A bedraggled girl runs in and sees Carmilla laying there.  
“Carm NO!”

**Author's Note:**

> So... I"M SORRY! IT WAS PAINFUL TO WRITE! Thank you for reading, as always, please leave feedback to let me know how you liked it and if you'd want me to write more for this fandom as this is my first work for this wonderful fandom. If you've read my other work for the Agent Carter fandom, I promise I haven't forgotten. Bye Lovelies!


End file.
